Advice From James Potter: Getting the Redhead of Your Dreams
by Karbear10
Summary: In an Alternate Universe where Voldemort never came to power and James and Lily were never killed, James thinks that he's an expert on girls. So, in Harry's 6th year, when he starts developing a crush on Ginny, who does he go to for advice?
**Advice from James Potter: Getting the Redhead of your Dreams**

 _In an Alternate Universe where Voldemort never came to power and James and Lily were never killed, James thinks that he's an expert on girls. So, in Harry's 6th year, when he starts developing a crush on Ginny, who does he go to for advice?_

 **A/N: So… it's been ages since I've updated anything or posted anything new. But here this is. Something new! I actually got this idea from somewhere online, but I don't actually remember where. Whoops! Anyways, the idea was someone's, but the actual story is mine. I do not own the characters, either. Anyways, here it is, hope you enjoy!**

 _Dear Harry,_

 _I hope your break is going well. Mine is going pretty good. I'm going to go finish up some Christmas shopping later today. I just need to get a present for Percy, Ron, and Dad. I've been trying to find something good, but without much luck. I think I might have something, though. Just in time, too. Christmas is in just a few days. A present for you should be arriving soon! As I'm sure Ron told you if he's written, Mum and Dad say hi and wish you a Merry Christmas. Wish your parents a Merry Christmas for me. I hope you're all doing well!_

 _Merry Christmas!_

 _Ginny_

Harry reread the letter from Ginny for about the twentieth time. He replied to her as soon as he had gotten the chance, but he hadn't yet heard back from her. He supposed he shouldn't be surprised. It would have been Christmas by the time she received it, and she would probably have been spending time with her family. He was sure she would write back once she had the time.

Harry then looked at the present he had been sent. It was a small snowglobe with a castle that looked extremely like Hogwarts. He suspected that it had been charmed to appear so. It was currently sitting on a shelf next to a few of his most prized possessions.

He sighed slightly, before walking into the living room where his parents both sat. James was reading the daily prophet, and Lily was reading a book. Harry slowly walked over to his father. "Um, Dad?" He said.

James looked up and smiled. "Yes Harry?" He asked, setting his paper aside.

Harry sat down in a chair next to his father's. He thought for a second, before saying, "You've always said you're an expert on girls, right?"

James grinned broadly. "Why, yes, I am." He replied. Not looking up from her book, Lily snorted. James shot her a look before giving his attention back to Harry.

Harry shifted awkwardly. "Well, I kind of need help with something…" he began. "There's this girl…"

James leaned forwards. "Is it still that girl from last year? Cho, wasn't it?"

Harry shook his head. "No, it's not her. It's somebody else." He told him.

James looked curious. "Well, then, who is it?" He asked Harry.

"Well…"

Suddenly James' face brightened. "Oh, Harry is it Ginny Weasley?" He exclaimed.

Harry felt his face heating up. "Er, well…" He said.

A wide smile split James' face. "It is!" He cried. "Oh, Harry, this is wonderful!" From across the room, Lily chuckled softly at James. He laughed and continued on with, "I've been waiting so long for this, Harry! I've prepared everything to tell you! At last I present to you: Advice From an Expert: Getting the Redhead of your Dreams!"

Harry was taken aback. This was not what he had been expecting. "Oh. Okay?" He said.

James got suddenly serious. "Now, Harry, I need you to listen closely. I am about to give you some essential tips that are necessary to win over any girl."

Harry nodded uncertainly, which James took as a sign to continue.

"Okay, Harry, now, the first thing you need to remember is to make sure she's single. If she is, great. If she's not… still just keep going with the plan."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "Dad are you sure? That doesn't sound right."

James nodded. "Of course I'm sure. I ended up with your mother, didn't I?"

Lily muttered something under her breath; James chose to ignore it. "Now next, you need to remember that it's okay to just ask her out." He thought for a second, before adding as an after thought, "Assuming she is single, of course."

Harry nodded slowly. At least that made sense.

James then said, "And it's also good to be persistent. If she says no, wait a few days, then ask again. Girls admire a guy who doesn't give up. Now depending on her personality, there are several ways you may want to ask her out. From what I've seen, Ginny is a fun girl. So your best bet is probably to do something creative. She'll likely appreciate it. Remember: the worst she can do is say no."

At that, Lily finally looked up from her book to raise an eyebrow at her husband. Catching her eye, James added, "Or hex you. That sometimes happens, too."

Harry's eyes widened slightly. That did not sound very pleasant. He'd heard plenty of nasty stories about Ginny's legendary Bat Bogey Hex.

James, seeming not to notice his son's reaction, just kept talking. "Another thing; act cool, kind of tough; girls always go for the bad boy."

"Um, Dad, I really don't think-"

"Hush, Harry. Listen to the expert." James tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Ah, yes. Flirt with other girls to make her jealous. Works _every time_. Also, make it perfectly clear to her that you have other options; you could have any girl you wanted and you're choosing her." He glanced at Harry. "Also, it always helps to look attractive. Not that you look bad," he added hurriedly, "but," he clapped Harry on the shoulder, "it never hurts to build up some muscle. And speaking of attractiveness, you need to style you're hair just right. Kind of sweep it back like this…" James pushed Harry's hair back and off to one side, muttering as he did so.

James sat in thought for a moment. Harry awkwardly put his hair back in position. This really had not been what he had been expecting when he asked his father for help.

Lily sighed from where she was sitting. "You are such an idiot." She murmured softly.

James looked at her in mock hurt. "I resent that comment, Lils."

She didn't look up at him. "Doesn't change the fact that you're an idiot."

James smiled lovingly at her. "Yes, but I'm _your_ idiot. Your idiot who is giving good advice to our son here."

Lily rolled her eyes, muttering something under her breath.

James looked back at Harry. "I would also advise you to learn some good pick-up lines. Girls can't resist them." He shot a look over at Lily, then leaned in and muttered, "Except your mother, but she's an entirely different story."

Harry nodded. He had heard all about how his mum used to hate his dad, until he had gotten more mature and had stopped hexing people just for the fun of it.

"If she rejects you, pretend it doesn't bother you." James advised. "Maybe look a little put out at first, then just smile and laugh it off. Act confident. Make her _want_ you. Now, if she would happen to get another boyfriend while you're attempting to win her over… don't ask her out, just help her to see his faults. While conversing with her, be sure to bring up his _awful_ manners, or his _horrid_ breath, or the way he's just such a _slob_. And then, of course, don't forget to bring up one or two of your recent achievements to make yourself look favorable over him."

Harry was unsure about that. Ginny wasn't the type of girl who would stand for her boyfriend being insulted or listening to someone brag on themself. Was that _really_ good advice?

"Also, every so often, 'accidentally' knock her books out of her hands, then offer to pick them up. She'll be impressed with how gentlemanly you're being." James added. "I think that's all I have for now… Oh, wait! Sometimes it's a good idea to ask her out when you're alone. You know, in case she would be embarrassed with witnesses around. But often times, it's better to ask her out in public, to show her that you really care. Do you have any questions?"

Harry thought for a second, then nodded slowly. "How should I ask at first. In public, or in private?"

James shrugged. "It depends. Which do you think would be better?"

"Well, in private would be easier…" Harry began.

James shook his head. "Which would be better for her?"

Harry thought for a couple of seconds. "Still probably alone."

"Well, there's your answer." James told him. "If she says yes, congratulations! If she says no, wait a while, then ask her again. Your best bet would probably be to ask her alone again. After about two or three tries, maybe try asking her with people around."

Lily rolled her eyes and set her book down on a nearby table, before standing up. She left the room and soon came back holding a glass of lemonade. She took a sip of it, not picking up her book as she was now watching Harry and James with a look of amusement.

"Oh, something else. It goes along with flirting with other girls." James exclaimed. "If she rejects you two or three times, go on a date with another girl. You know, just a one-time thing. Make her jealous, let her see what she's missing out on. Also, of course, if she has a boyfriend, don't ask her out."

Harry nodded. That made sense. If he asked her out while she was already dating somebody, there would be no chance of her saying yes. The whole point of asking her out would be to get her to say yes, so if there was no chance, there was no point.

"Wait." James paused for a second. "I think I've already said that. Anyways, don't. Just get rid of the issue."

"If she gets a new haircut or something, should I comment on it?" Harry questioned.

" _No_!" James was horrified. "Harry, I thought I taught you better than that! You comment on Facebook, you do _not_ comment on girls!"

Hearing that, Lily burst into a fit of giggles. James looked at her with amusement and love. Harry glanced at her, then back at James and blinked. "Dad, are you sure that's right? I've heard that girls love being complimented."

James gave Harry a look. "Have I ever steered you wrong?"

"Well…"

"Don't answer that." James pushed his glasses up. "Also, when asking her out, don't appear nervous. To girls, that is a sign of weakness. Make eye contact; don't avoid it. Talk clearly and be confident. Tell yourself she _will_ say yes, and if she doesn't, take the time to be shocked later. _Not_ in front of her. Now you only have a year and a half left to work with, so we're going to have to figure out a plan that will work quickly."

Lily laughed again. "A plan? And I suppose you had a _plan_ the whole time?"

James smirked at her. "As a matter of fact, I did."

"And I suppose the plan all along was for me to fall for you at the last minute?"

James grinned widely. "But of course." He turned to Harry once more. "Okay, Harry, I think the best plan of attack would be to turn the Potter charm _way_ up. And I mean _way_ up. It's guaranteed to work."

Harry looked dubious. "Guarunteed?"

James nodded. "Yup. I had all the ladies at Hogwarts after me from day one."

"Not Mum, though." Harry pointed out. "You know, the only one you really wanted?"

James gave Harry a look. "Not the point, Harry." He said. "Just trust me. It will work."

"Okay," Harry said, "I think that's all I need. Thanks, Dad."

James grinned. "Anytime." He then picked up his newspaper and began to read once more.

Harry stood up and exited the room slowly. After a second, Lily sighed and followed him. She grabbed his shoulder gently. He turned around. "Yes Mum?" He asked.

Lily smiled. "As… amusing… as that was, I have some advice I think you might find more helpful." At Harry's nod, she continued. "You have to remember, Harry, girls are people too. Don't treat them like objects. Be respectful and don't embarrass her by pestering her. It's perfectly okay to give her compliments, but don't overdo it. Also, make her love you, not your looks. And if she's already in a relationship, just let it run it's course. In other words, just do the exact opposite of what your father says."

 **A/N: So. There it was. I'm not entirely positive on the quality of this, but it was loads of fun to write. That's really all I have to say. I hope you enjoyed, please review!**


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